Love-hate

It’s 1 AM now. One of the rare days i am still awake at this hour. And i am appreciating every minute of it before they disappear real soon. Was at the airport earlier just now to sent the brother and sis in law off to korea. Felt really nostalgic when i saw tour guides getting ready at the counters, waiting for the “guests” to arrived.

ohhhh!  I miss traveling during this time of the year so so much. As compared to many people my age, i was fortunate, to be able to travel on a yearly basis when i was young. What’s more, when i told friends, i am traveling with my neighbors, who are also my childhood friends, they envied me. 

HAHA! anyway the point is, i miss traveling during this time of the year with my childhood friends, the thick jackets,the gloves and the scarfs.

Its already friday. 3 more days to monday, the first official day at work. Its a love hate relationship. Happy that i am finally embarking on my next journey but sad at the same time because i am officially putting an end to all my holidays.

I don’t know what to expect but i am really really excited. Just hoping everything goes well. Bless with good colleagues and boss.

What are words?

Think before you speak.

Sometimes words can hurt. Much more than you realize.

And when you said that, are you sure you are right about them?

You said you doubt so, i think i doubt so too.

#friendshipwoes

the hard truth

I am standing on cloud nine =D

Yes, this is how it should be. The emotions and the feelings i experience this time round is totally different. This i know, is the one i have always been looking for, the one i am secretly looking forward to.

Now, at the last instance, or rather the last step to success, i hope everything turns out really good. No matter what is it now, its the interests that makes everything count.

It’s really the hard truth. How everything seems to be pre planned the moment i am created. Sometimes, its just too hard not to believe. Every stage, every happening seems to  make us stronger and better.

And i am still believing:)

HELLO!

Hello!!!

Everything has been so good so far. I haven’t gotten myself a job ( or rather i am still waiting for one) but i am still sending my resume as and when i find the scopes interesting.

As for now, i love it that i have sufficient time to do my own things, accompanying my parents while i can ( i know how hard it would be once i start working), meeting up with friends whom i haven’t met for ages and keeping myself fit.

I would say, i have learnt alot these 5 months. I have seen how people change, how i have improve as a person and the way i should behave in different situations. I have found my interests and now i know where i want to belong.

It might seemed as if i am enjoying myself, but the journey is definitely tough. The emotional turmoils when i face rejections were the hardest. Each time, i had to buck myself up and tell myself this isnt the end of the world. There are better things out there waiting to be discovered by me. The place where i learn, grow and then finally be able to fit.

This i believe =)

when the phone gonna ring?

Feeling and getting really pessimistic these days. Not just me i guess. But here i am worrying everyday, hoping one fine day when i woke up that tiny winni miracle will happen.

Anyone get my drift? The thing is, action is the only thing that will make things happen. And the fact that things happened for some reasons. No, no contradiction at all. But still why is there a need to wait? sometimes i simply don’t get it 😦

When its meant to be

Read from a friend’s blog and she mentioned blogging is no longer an event update, no longer a platform for us to update where we were, and who we were with because afterall, the people you are with are the ones who will be reading. so why bother?

quite true isn’t it. I haven’t been doing my random blogpost in a long time for the same reason. I am not obliged to write because every happenings and every memories are meant to be kept by self. And come to think of it, it has now offically became the platform where i rant all my thoughts and feelings instead of the usual event updating which we could otherwise do it on twitter or Facebook, simply clicking the “post” or “share” button.

to me, perhaps all these are growing up processes. we gradually grown tired of it, and simply stop doing so. its the same as photo taking. How we used to camwhore everywhere, anywhere under the sun but now, we have learnt to appreciate each others’ present and nothing beats having a good conversation with a good friend over coffee or meals.

was sharing with a girlfriend, growing up process comes in stages. For some, it may be earlier while for others, maybe later. so why the rush right? if its, meant to be, there’s definitely no escape route. so, i was actually worrying about myself because some of my friends have already think so much ahead. When to get married, when to ballot of a house, when to have a child, etc etc etc. Was feeling more at ease after talking them out with J, i can finally conclude because the day where i am going to have such thoughts are no where near yet. yes no where near. or rather, not my priority now because i need a job! 😉 

What comes around goes around

Chapter.
Crossroad.
Decisions.
Independent.
Growing up.
Without regrets.
Hiccups.
Learning.

Part and parcel of life!

Tumbling down

Feeling like crap now! Woke up feeling all refresh because of the morning run I had but now everything just has to tumble over.

When someone says no one ever understands or who understands me?

Why wouldnt they think it the other way round? Someone actually did to let go of the hard feelings. Someone actually did to stand in your shoes and think in your best perspectives.

Someone did and I did! But the person who ask the question never understood this.

Always put yourself in other people’s shoe that is to say.

Speaking of expectations, one would always expect a certain criteria to be fulfilled.

Speaking of truthfulness, it is this that makes everything works doesn’t it? Tell me if I am wrong.

Iphone snippets

Back from my belated birthday celebrations with the buddies but yet feeling too high from the games at game nation that i couldn’t sleep. And since it has been pretty long since i uploaded loads of photos, here are the most recent ones taken today =)

Dinner at verve pizza bar recommended by weiling!

served pretty good pizzas and pastas different from the norms

testing out my polaroid in prep for korea before the film expires!

revived our childhood with jenga at playnation

BBFL ❤

trapped

Ever since my first relationship ended, i have been constantly reminding myself, if i were to go into one in future, i would make myself a better girlfriend but i just disappoint myself so much yesterday.

For a good 5 years i have been reminding myself not to be too reliant on the special someone. I’ve got to be independent! Do things myself so i would not appear to have taken someone for granted. For the past 1 year i have been good. The reminder stayed with me so much so that reuben had to tell me please depend on me.

But up till today, the reminder seems to have just disappeared. Being too dependent and taking him for granted just happened too quickly without even me realizing it. Until yesterday when he told me, he wanted to extend his internship for 2 weeks, it kind of struck me. i could have been more supportive, and say yes go ahead its a very good experience. but hell no! i got so damn sad. Well probably because i’ve been left alone for too long, stuck at  home for the longest time ever. Secretly hoping we could meet up more often after his internship ended.

sigh, then i started reflecting why everything turn out the way it was and i end up feeling so damn pissed with myself. Even reuben guess it right why i am feeling so. which means to say i am falling deeper and deeper into that never-ending trap.so much for typing this entry, it serve as a reminder to pull myself up from the trap 😦